3 Winters from 1988 by Astronaut Adam

I had to take a step back
I was tired of grinding all the time
If you're mad just accept that I had to take care of my mind
I'll never regret the fact that I've tried
I'm really trying
I'm doing nothing less than taking care of mine
I deserve all that I've earned
I've put in the work
10000 more that's for certain for what it's worth
There's gotta be more at store than death and birth
I'm blessed but cursed within this hell on earth
Heaven within us
Dead in the center is the heart of God as my witness
Penning this sentence
Written in the winter
December blues
It's right on schedule
Remember to meditate and eat your vegetables
It's a letter to a better you
My higher self
What it comes down to
I'm focusing on health
Whatever comes up I let it through and then it's felt
I'll heal the soul and grow and then I can go and help
When you're alone in this cold world and it feels like nobody's there for you
My home is always open when nobody cares for you
See I've been there a few
A phone call to a homie just to get in to tune could mean a whole lot
I swear it do
When it feels like life's unbearable
I had it terrible
I broke the cycle
I couldn't expect my parents to
I grew up on a miracle
Poor apparel
Dry cereal
Tune it out
Turn up the stereo

We dealing with a whole lotta trauma
From my mama to her mama's mama
My father was never a father so he couldn't teach me how to be your father
So it follows
My soul is hollow
My whole life has been survival
Go figure
I didn't have a father figure
That's why I'm triggered
Despite all I've been through I'm not spiteful
RIP my uncle Michael

Let me get right to it
Life ain't easy gotta get through it
You got a dream
You've gotta pursue it
You gotta believe you can just do it
I broke through it
Those thoughts became intrusive
When I realized that I was just a product of a childhood that was abusive
I choose to live more elusive
The older that I grow I'm more rooted
Taking care of family and making music
The more self-control I have when I'm losing it
So in the booth I went
I had to
I had to go inside and hide and search within
I came out of the other side with a pad and a pen
I needed to remember why I do this and what needs to be said
Because the truth is sometimes I forget and get up in my head
What is my true intention
Am I just craving attention
Because it was missing when I was a kid or when I playing victim
The reason that I am so driven
I always wanted somebody to listen
Like all my problems that would fix it
So I became a musician at 16
It felt like for me that was the best way to share my vision
An MC with six strings and precision
I've got a lot to give
I hope my gift can lift the opposition
This is a written proposition
I took a little minute for my mental but now I'm right back in it
I sat on these instrumentals for three winters
I can't keep it a secret
I'd regret it if I kept it
Finally about to drop this record

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