Chapter Two from THE CLIMBER by JUDGE SMITH

CHOIR:
Beds to be made and the rooms to be cleaned again,
breakfast to be cleared away and tables to be laid for dinner.
Food to be cooked, and supplies to be carried in,
luggage must be taken down and reservations need confirming.
Floors to be swept, and the snow to be cleared away,
taxis to be ordered, and a telegram to be delivered.
Bills to be paid, and new staff to be interviewed,
menus to be chosen, and the wine list to be redesigned…

We aim to show hospitality.
This is what defines our industry.
We welcome all, as we welcome you,
and though we get tired, our smile is true.
Ask any cook, any licensee,
there’s no harder work, they’d all agree.
The strangers come, but as friends they go.
We have new Best Friends each week or so.

They want a table for six…And I need coffee for four…
Room Twenty-Two has checked out…
And Room Fourteen has just arrived…More Prosecco over there…They need more Grappa down here…
This one is always half-drunk…And that one there tips pretty good…

THE CLIMBER:
I soon found the climbers’ hotel, high above the town.
I liked the place; it seemed very clean.
Apparently the food and the wine were good,
but I never cared about that sort of thing.
Lots of climbers in the bar,
English and French and German and Italian.
They were all hugger-mugger, and friendly together in the stuffy room.

CHOIR:
A tortellini with beans…An ossobuco and rice…
I think my table is Dutch…And mine can only speak Chinese…

THE CLIMBER:
This is the worst part, I need to be a good fellow,
One of the boys, one of the boys.
Managed to make up a rope with some German lads.
They had booked a guide,
and they were glad for me to share expenses.
We would make a basic ascent of the principal peak of the valley,
the next morning.
In my room, all the windows wide open, one blanket on the bed.
To be cold is to grow strong.

CHOIR:
Beds to be made and the rooms to be cleaned again,
breakfast to be cleared away and tables to be laid for dinner.
Food to be cooked, and supplies to be carried in,
luggage must be taken down and reservations need confirming.
Floors to be swept, and the snow to be cleared away,
taxis to be ordered, and a telegram to be delivered.
Bills to be paid, and new staff to be interviewed,
menus to be chosen, and the wine list to be reconsidered…
All night, we’re still working… HUH!

• Alternative
• accoustic
• narrative rock
• neo-classical-rock
• songs
• Glastonbury