Accidental Angel from Crimson Daughter by Melissa Cox

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I wrote "Accidental Angel" at New Zealand's regional Burning Man, called Kiwiburn. Surrounded by lights, bonfires, immersive art, and pounding electronic music until the early hours of the morning, I felt a shift in my consciousness. I don't think I've ever written a song so fast as I have "Accidental Angel." The meaning of the lyrics were not apparent to me at the time..... until I had a heartbreaking miscarriage a few months later. My husband and I had begun trying for a baby soon after I returned from Kiwiburn, and the lyrics from "Accidental Angel" I had written months before rang in my head as I lay in the hospital, my womb empty like the burned temple at Kiwiburn : "Make something out of nothing, just to burn it all down // You saw that I was empty so you climbed inside to color my walls. But now that I've imploded, here's the technicolor rubble of your love. \\ We've grown so much together that our fates are intertwined. But will there come a day when we have coiled so tight that we begin to unwind?"

I hadn't written a premonitory song before, but I believe in the cow paddocks at Kiwiburn, dancing under the stars, I saw a glimpse into my heartbreaking future through the lens of this song. (Not to end it on an unhappy note.... my husband and I did get pregnant again and we had a beautiful baby boy 2 years afterwards!)
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Tracklist

4.	Accidental Angel	4:18

Lyrics

Lyrics:

Make something out of nothing just to burn it all down.
Insert yourself into it just to pull out.
I wanna stay inside it. I wanna cut the rope and let it all go.
But how can I plant it when I just refuse to let it grow?

Ooo my accidental angel. Ooo you pulled me out of hell
Into the sky. Into the sky.

I changed the locks on my heart just to make you break in.
Divide the lies between us to share in the sin.
You saw that I was empty so you climbed inside to color my walls.
But now that I've imploded, here's the technicolor rubble of your love.

I stand naked by the fire and howl at the flames
While you calculate your numbers in their Ponzi scheme.
We've grown so much together that our fates are intertwined.
But will there come a day when we have coiled so tight we begin
To unwind?

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Credits

from Crimson Daughter, released October 26, 2017

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