Bum from Drivin' Barefoot by Ted Wulfers

BUM
Ted Wulfers

I’m such a lazy, hazy, dirty, horny, do nothin’, out of it
Not hungover, sleepy, happy, nappy not so weepy
Feelin’ sorry that I’m never fellin’ sorry for myself today

I’m an asker, multi tasker, servant’s servant, I’m a master
Ain’t no smoker, but a toker and sometimes a midnight joker
With my hunger on a diet and my freedom on a big ole chain

I’m a werewolf, I’m Brazilian, more aloof than Maximillian
Valentino on Viagra, salamander from Niagra
With a walnut colored ego that can screw more than a phillips on Aleve

I brought tsunamis to your punani, tucked you in in your pajamies
Read you Dickens, Keats and Shelly though your feet were kinda smelly
Took your tambourine and shook you all night long like AC/DC do

I’m a weirdo with a libido, you’ll never see me in a speedo
I’m grease lightning only quicker and I run on good cheap liquor
If heaven were a bar, I might say that’s “S.W.E.L.L.”

I’m a drop out, I’m a cop out and I’m proud to be a knock out
With my guitar in my hand, I travel air and sea and land
Makin’ up these songs about women and wine

Well I’m such a lazy, hazy, dirty, horny, do nothin’, out of it
Not hungover, sleepy, happy, nappy not so weepy
Feelin’ sorry that that’s all that I have to say to you

All Words & Music by Ted Wulfers
©2005, 2007 Ted Wulfers
Wheres My Marlin Music (SESAC)
Lyrics used By Permission

• Blues
• Folk
• Jam Band
• Rock
• Roots
• Ukulele
• Los Angeles